Life is ours, we live it our way

  Oh..hello there, let me just put on my headphones and pop up another beer ..
Good.. now I am back .. oh this beer .. I love it,  I had some medical problems so I wasn't allowed to drink for about 16 days . It was pretty painful , but now I have a sweet six pack right next to me .
   You know I also wasn't allowed to go to work for some time so I had plenty of spare time to think about myself and what am I doing with my life . Obviously I concluded that I am too fucking awesome and that it's imperative necessary to stay as hidden as possible and not letting the majority of the people to see my awesomeness in his purest form possible, I am afraid they would cause riots , churches will be raped women will be burned and so on ..
   Seriously now, for a reason I don't fully understand right now it seems that the shit is about to hit the fan , I am older than ever before and the fact that I know I am not the brightest crayon from the pack doesn't help me too much . At work is ok , in fact I may have some chances not to get fired , at home I am making a perfect team with myself ... like look at those beers I bought them for me .. I can't say anything else .. who would go at 2 : 30 in the morning , ignoring two packs of stray dogs , and buy me an six pack ? I would ! Fuck yeah !
    Sometimes I wish I could turn back the time just to straighten up some things , some ugly things I did in the past , I am not always sorry about what have I done , but sometimes , just sometimes, I wish I could thank some people for being part of my life , even if that time passed by very quickly , the memories and the feelings that those people gave me left a mark ( not a scar ) on my heart . Sometimes I wish the world would be as I see it right now after three beers .. lovely , with people in which you can trust .. sadly only an foul would trust someone else . As much as we like to think about ourselves as social beings , the only thing that keeps as together is the egoistic need of one and another . If we could be self sustaining physically and psychically we would not give a fuck about others . That is just my opinion .. and another golden rule is " Do not take any advice about life or love from anybody . This is YOUR life .. THEY can't know 100% what is good or bad for you .. think for yourself and make decisions after you thoughtfully compared the risks and the advantages . Look at me ..saying don't listen to any advice and I am giving them like you just crack opened a bag of fortune cookies .
     Anyhow... what I wanted to say is .. enjoy your life , enjoy what you feel and enjoy the moments with your family and friends , don't collect things..objects ..collect moments , collect joy through memories , it will come a time when all we will have would be those memories .
    May you all be blessed by some super power out there in the Universe... God.. Flying Spaghetti Monster or even Cthulhu ruler of all and beyond .  I don't know how much of the old " Jack " is in me , it seems that he's fading away , so  be good folks , as I stated before I love each and everyone of you  , stay safe !

Oh and this is for you , for the ones that keep coming here to find out if I am still living , I do miss you, so close no matter how far

Just Hopes

This is the place where R. grew up, I enter and take small steps on this plane ,far in the distance I can see the forest , I pull a cigar from the pack and light it up, inhale, let's take a walk together , shall we ?
We are walking on the same road R. walked so many times , I can almost see him and his brother heading to the river , pass the forest , on that big yellow hill with a "V" on it .
I lay down in the grass and I am starting to watch the sky , is not night yet , the sun is setting on my left and crisp red rays shine desperately from the clouds . At my right there is nothing except the plain and my shadow stretching on the grass like a memory soon to be forgotten . I open my beer bottle and take a sip , the first cigar is history but her cancerous smoke still rises to the sky .
" I fuckin' miss you people " Shouts R. from the depths of my conscience .
The Sun is going down on the other side, small bugs are crawling in the grass next to my head , I light up another cigar and lay down watching the sky again . I am feeling small , I suddenly know that even If I write this in the instance I am seeing those things you wouldn't be able to enjoy what I am feeling .
The others..the world doesn't belong "here" this is a forgotten place , an cocktail of memories , feelings and images , and to feel what I am feeling right now you will need all the ingredients .
"You" are my friend now .. come next to me so I could tell you stories about ancient battles which took place here , or how in that forest something followed R. and his brother for almost 2 miles , or how deers are coming out from the forest to greet the lone travelers or how about those hidden treasures my grandpa use to tell me about , the ones that have a bright flame just above them , and if you lured by the flame would dig them up , demons will come from and steal your mind making you insane.
There is no word to properly express your feelings, I will end this here , there is just me and the sky . I want to fade away in the memories, nothing is like it used to be , knowing this I smile at the new Moon and drink a beer in her name .