What what .. in the butt ?!

             I spent nine days at my country side , without any link with the civilized world , I felt that I was somehow disconnected from this big network , the weather was awful , mud , rain and sometimes snow accompanied by the howling wind and the ever present cold . My grandmother faces this realm everyday , all alone in a village taken from the post Medieval times .
             Armed with my laptop , and a couple packs of cigars I stood there , day by day contemplating the wonders of isolation and craving for some signal on my mobile modem .
 I left that place two days ago , I don't know why but when I was younger the nights spent there were pretty much terrifying , I always thought that in the darkest corners was some evil thing ready to grab me . Don't know for sure if it was just a phobia but me and my bro had some pretty neat experiences near the forest , located approximately at 3 kilometers from the village ( night time , flashlights and some spooky things ) .
             Anyway the funniest thing that happened over there recently was ( sadly ) one of my dreams , well in this awesome dream of mine , suddenly in the courtyard began to appear some weird children .
As I thought they were really demons , and I , like a good wannabe exorcist had the job to get rid of them ... And boy how I exorcised the crap out of them... with some wooden bats , my personal fists and boots .. I felt enlighten , they were scared shitles and I was beating the evil matter out of them while praising the Lawd .
             Actually I never had been a religious type of guy , I like science ..and while magnets are natural wonders and miracles I stood there and accepted the evolution without questioning anything , unfortunately what Darwin omitted to say in his writings was that a small part of dudes are evolved from the "sus scrofa" ( Like me ) .
            Ever wondered what would you say if Satan himself will appear one day in front of your mortal eyes and told you " I have an offer you can't refuse " ?  I don't know for sure but probably in exchange for my soul I will butt fuck him .. I am not gay and I don't have anything against gay people ( hei ..more girls for me equals more sandwiches so it's a win win situation ) . But imagine the look on the devils face when you will tell him , prepare for "surprise buttsex motherfucker " Hell .. How can he drag you in ..Hell knowing that he was your bitch ? I remember that part from Prison Brake where the bitch inmates would hang from the pockets of their sugar daddy ..
             Ok.. enough with my gay adventures with mr Devil .. I am going to take a good long nap , and with a little luck I will dream something nicer this time .

So long internets and you two people which are still reading this non sense . I love you ..what what .. in the butt ?!